Vladimir: well, well. Look what the cat barfed up.
Vladimir: ignoring me? how mature.
Princess Tofu: what the hell do you want?
Vladimir: well, I was going to say hello and wish you a good day, but now you can shove it right up your anus
Princess Tofu: Anus! How technical
Vladimir: Yes, it is, you woman of easy virtue
Princess Tofu: Who said I had any "virtue"?
Vladimir: certainly not your mother
Princess Tofu: How the hell would she know! She picked up sailors!
Princess Tofu: She was her own "fleet week"
Vladimir: I've got her on the phone right now and she wants you to call her...
Princess Tofu: Since when are you and my mom so buddy buddy
Vladimir: since we bonded over our hatred of someone
Princess Tofu: That's not nice to talk about my dad while he is home.
Vladimir: Um, yeah. Your dad.
Princess Tofu: What are you doing now?
Vladimir: Working. You?
Princess Tofu: Eating Breakfast before I go to sleep
Vladimir: Fun. I should have called in sick.
Princess Tofu: why
Vladimir: why not
Princess Tofu: good point
Vladimir: could have slept in late, played with the cats. Gone shopping
Vladimir: seen a movie, had lunch, got a tattoo, robbed a bank. the possibilities are endless
Princess Tofu: Now you're talking!
Princess Tofu: How are my little babies?
Vladimir: Jeez. How many kids have you littered across the streets of Milwaukee?
Princess Tofu: I'm taking about the pussies
Vladimir: How many pussies have you littered across the streets of milwaukee?
Princess Tofu: It's like a broadway opening night
Vladimir: I don't get it
Princess Tofu: Lots and lots
Vladimir: So, yesterday, only three of us were here. Mommy was 'working' at the other location. So right at lunch time I sent out an email saying group lunch, my treat. And then we went to lunch. She tried emailing us and calling to find out where we were going, but we ignored her.
Vladimir: Then we got back and bossman sent out an email saying his wife was there right now with the new baby. Because she's all into that, and so she was all mad.
Princess Tofu: Where did you go for group lunch
Vladimir: Pedro's
Vladimir: For some Mexicali food. Yi-yi-yi-yi
Princess Tofu: What's the baby look like?
Vladimir: Then bossman sends out an email saying we got box seats for the Brewers last night and if you wanted them you had to go to his office right away.
Princess Tofu: That brilliant bastard!
Vladimir: we had a lot of laughs at her expense yesterday
Princess Tofu: So I take it Mommy popped a blood vessel in her head
Vladimir: dunno. maybe. we didn't have to look at her, so who knows?
Princess Tofu: Sometimes life is just beautiful
Vladimir: just like me. on the inside. where it counts
Princess Tofu: Whatever
Vladimir: ahh, your scathing wit
Princess Tofu: Did you hear about all the Satanist grafitti at Holy Hill? They think there is a mad bunch on the loose!
Vladimir: Tell your friends that shit ain't cool
Princess Tofu: It's not my friends
Vladimir: whatever. birds of a feather
Princess Tofu: What the hell does that mean?
Vladimir: I have to get some ice water
Princess Tofu: why
Vladimir: because I have a human body that requires water to sustain itself. I can't live on brimstone and human souls like you
Princess Tofu: I don't worship the devil, I don't even believe in one
Vladimir: what's the devil got to do with the fact that you eat human souls?
Princess Tofu: Paranoid delusions again?
Vladimir: I thought you were a cross between a vampire and a chupacabra
Princess Tofu: How's your head feel right now? i'm sticking the pins in the doll
Vladimir: how's life treating you? I've got the doll pinned beneath the crushing weight of stone in a dog park where several times a day, dogs tinkle all over it.
Princess Tofu: You say the sweetest things. You really know how to charm a girl!
Vladimir: take off, hoser
Princess Tofu: que?
Vladimir: take off, eh
Princess Tofu: How dare you insult me with your "canadian" vulgarities
Vladimir: if anyone knows vulgarites, it's the canadians
Princess Tofu: Bastards!
Vladimir: Canadian Bastards
Princess Tofu: French Canadian Bastards
Vladimir: Them, I like
Princess Tofu: Shut-up
Vladimir: I will not shut up
Princess Tofu: Again, I say shut up asshole
Vladimir: that hurts. Just for that I'm not getting you anything from Crate and Barrel at lunch
Princess Tofu: I'm sorry! Really, really, sorry!
Vladimir: whatever, sweater. too late
Princess Tofu: Well, Fuck ya then!
Vladimir: I can feel the love streaming from the computer screen
Princess Tofu: Cram it Princess!
Vladimir: I'm going to get some water. go blow it out your nose
Princess Tofu: fine. I'll talk to you later
Vladimir: god, i hope not
Princess Tofu: Bitch
Vladimir: Ugh, you still here?
Princess Tofu: yes
Princess Tofu: YES!
Vladimir: I heard ya the first time
Princess Tofu: What now?
Vladimir: Um. No clue
Princess Tofu: I want t go to sleep
Vladimir: so go
Vladimir: who's stopping you?
Princess Tofu: alright nite
Vladimir: byeeee