Vladimir Yakamura: Shouldn't you be working?
Princess Tofu: yes, but i have vacation days that i needed to use up and am getting ready to paint
Vladimir Yakamura: is 'paint' code for streetwalking?
Princess Tofu: no bitch, actual painting of the walls.
Vladimir Yakamura: well, you can't blame me for making sure
Vladimir Yakamura: what color?
Princess Tofu: its called popcorn ball. It's a light beige.
Vladimir Yakamura: my dining room is pumpkin butter
Princess Tofu: i originally was going to just paint everything black, but, mom talked me out of it.
Vladimir Yakamura: interfering cow
Princess Tofu: tell me about it
Vladimir Yakamura: it took me three tries to get the dining room where it is, and frankly, I may do it again next spring
Princess Tofu: This is going to get 2 coats and that's it. Plaster be damned.
Vladimir Yakamura: No, I meant color tries
Vladimir Yakamura: first color I had 'help' with and it was supposed to be copper and turned into bubblegum pink
Princess Tofu: sweet
Vladimir Yakamura: second try was allegedly a brownish color and turned into bright orange
Princess Tofu: even sweeter
Vladimir Yakamura: third try is this pumpkin butter which is brownish/orange and is better than the other two, but I might go to a straight tan or brown
Vladimir Yakamura: living room is yellow
Vladimir Yakamura: my only regret in the living room is going flat instead of semi gloss
Princess Tofu: Oh hell no! This is going semi-gloss now. I am not sure what they used before........it has the washability of egg tempura.
Vladimir Yakamura: yeah, and that's why I should have done semi in the living room. you can tell the dining room will be easy to wipe down. it reflects light better, too
Vladimir Yakamura: and my new chandelier really throws off a lot of light
Princess Tofu: god bless shiny
Princess Tofu: Your dining room is not that tall, what kind of chandelier could you have that wouldn't get bumped into?
Vladimir Yakamura: one that I had installed right up close to the ceiling
Vladimir Yakamura: it's nice and so much better than the "Dynasty" brass and glass monstrosity that was there when I bought the house
Princess Tofu: Something ala "liberace" with lots of hanging crystals.
Vladimir Yakamura: you remember it. it was that fake shiny brass and glass panels. I was so happy to see it come down
Princess Tofu: no I'm talking about the new one
Vladimir Yakamura: Oh, yes, the Liberace collection
Vladimir Yakamura: it came with a boa
Princess Tofu: he really was a trendsetter way before his time. Does it spin and play music.
Vladimir Yakamura: do you have to ask?
Princess Tofu: Oh the joy of the holidays. Christmas music i bet.
Vladimir Yakamura: when you turn it on it says "and now it's time to return to the classics"
Princess Tofu: I bet it drives your neighbors nuts.
Vladimir Yakamura: they can't hear it over the screaming
Princess Tofu: que?
Vladimir Yakamura: they still fight
Princess Tofu: Oh god bless them. There is nothing better than nightly dustup to fall asleep to.
Vladimir Yakamura: yes, doors slamming and curse words are so soothing coming down through my ceiling
Princess Tofu: Why don't you say something.
Vladimir Yakamura: eh, it's fun to listen too, sometimes. And I don't want them moving out. I want the rent money
Princess Tofu: How fun would it be to have a crime scene right there to investigate.
Vladimir Yakamura: I wonder if my homeowner's insurance would cover repairs after a domestic disturbance?
Princess Tofu: Good question. How about crime scene clean up and bullet holes.
Vladimir Yakamura: I should check
Vladimir Yakamura: i'm replacing their entry door next week
Vladimir Yakamura: getting rid of that glass and steel security door
Princess Tofu: something you can lock on the outside so they can't come out?
Vladimir Yakamura: well, something that actually closes so it doesn't blow open in a high wind
Vladimir Yakamura: and looks slightly less ghetto
Vladimir Yakamura: i'm putting in a standard fiberglass door with window panes in it
Princess Tofu: Let's see how long that lasts with the door slammers.
Vladimir Yakamura: ooh, i'd charge them. because the door opens out instead of in, it's a special order that cost me $350. My contractor is charging me another $500 or $600 to install it
Princess Tofu: Ouch! Why cant you just cover it with animal skins or slide a boulder in front of it?
Vladimir Yakamura: man, I wish
Vladimir Yakamura: the only 'good' thing is that I can claim the expense on my taxes
Princess Tofu: well that is a bright spot
Vladimir Yakamura: but for $600 I could have replaced three windows
Princess Tofu: no shit
Vladimir Yakamura: or gotten six $100 hookers
Vladimir Yakamura: or 12 $50 hookers
Princess Tofu: Or one $600 hooker with 3 boobs
Vladimir Yakamura: why three?
Princess Tofu: it's exotic
Vladimir Yakamura: I guess
Vladimir Yakamura: Too bad I'm working or I'd run home and grab my painting tools and come over
Princess Tofu: That 's okay. Ma and da are coming on saturday and sunday to help.
Vladimir Yakamura: Good, I was kidding. It's effing cold out. If I go home today, I'm staying there
Princess Tofu: You are such a weinie.
Vladimir Yakamura: I'd help if it was warmer
Vladimir Yakamura: i still have to finish my doors and window trim
Princess Tofu: bullshit. i wish i could afford to move so I wouldn't have to paint
Vladimir Yakamura: Why do you have to?
Princess Tofu: cause i can't wash the walls.
Vladimir Yakamura: can't or won't?
Princess Tofu: no can't. The paint comes off if you wet your finger.
Vladimir Yakamura: Awesome. It's probably poisoning you, too
Princess Tofu: I couldn't get that lucky.
Princess Tofu: Nothing says happy holidays like a draining pustule.
Vladimir Yakamura: I'll probably paint the bedroom and bathroom next spring
Vladimir Yakamura: i'd like to redo the whole bathroom
Princess Tofu: what could you do with your bathroom. it's kind of smallish
Vladimir Yakamura: replace the sink and vanity
Vladimir Yakamura: rip out the tub surround and replace it with tile
Vladimir Yakamura: rip up the floor tiles and replace them
Vladimir Yakamura: paint
Princess Tofu: new lights
Vladimir Yakamura: and put real shelves over the toilet
Vladimir Yakamura: yes, replace the vanity lights
Vladimir Yakamura: and medicine cabinet
Princess Tofu: that would be really nice
Vladimir Yakamura: i think replacing the floor alone would make a huge difference
Vladimir Yakamura: it's crappy vinyl that wasn't put down correctly
Princess Tofu: oh yes. It would be nice to go marble top vanity and nice brushed chrome lights.
Princess Tofu: you could go with a tile floor
Vladimir Yakamura: I want to keep the storage under the sink
Princess Tofu: why not
Vladimir Yakamura: i still need to rip out the carpet and pull up the tack strips
Princess Tofu: There aren't any other cabinets in there anyway
Vladimir Yakamura: just the shelves over the terlet
Vladimir Yakamura: which either have to be replaced with real shelves or a cabinet
Princess Tofu: How about a trapdoor in the ceiling and ladder to get to it.
Vladimir Yakamura: I'd end up in the neighbor's bathroom
Vladimir Yakamura: so, you're not painting tonight?
Princess Tofu: Get rid of their bathroom
Princess Tofu: No, but i have a ton of shit to move around and wipe down so we can start bright and early.
Vladimir Yakamura: too bad, I was going to invite you over for a carpet pulling party
Princess Tofu: What are you doing the day after thanksgiving?
Vladimir Yakamura: I have the day off, so probably sitting in the dark and crying. Why do you ask?
Princess Tofu: I also have that day off. We could make it carpetpalooza
Vladimir Yakamura: you say that now, until you realize the amount of dog hair and dirt ground into it.
Vladimir Yakamura: it frankly scares me
Vladimir Yakamura: What was Tarzan's freaking monkey named?
Princess Tofu: I pulled out the carpet in my sister in laws moms house that had bugs. Cheetah.
Vladimir Yakamura: that's what I thought. why won't that fit?
Vladimir Yakamura: well, if nothing else, you can come over and check out the changes in Surly Acres
Vladimir Yakamura: and if some carpet happens to get pulled up, so much the better
Princess Tofu: what the hey, I'm game if you are.
Vladimir Yakamura: oh, it's spelled cheeta
Vladimir Yakamura: sure, I've got a box cutter with your name on it
Princess Tofu: Go get a small pry bar. It makes it a lot easier to pull up the carpet nail strips. I know that from experience.
Vladimir Yakamura: I think I bought one of those, too. I'll check and get one if not
Vladimir Yakamura: Can I slip some extra stuff I need to get rid of in your car?
Princess Tofu: Yeah, cause there if no way in hell i am stepping into a store on black friday. Why do you ask?
Vladimir Yakamura: I still have those boxes of Xmas stuff that the last guy left in the basement. Only now they are more dusty and probably smell of cat piss
Princess Tofu: OOOOOOOOO! How tempting is that.
Vladimir Yakamura: I know! Happy Holidays, right?
Princess Tofu: Yah You betcha
Vladimir Yakamura: Man, I have to throw that stuff out
Princess Tofu: Make sure you get some contractor plastic bags and we will mix it with the carpet.
Vladimir Yakamura: I actually bought those two weeks ago
Princess Tofu: And that's why you are in Mensa
Vladimir Yakamura: I'm just gonna throw the crap out back and the garbage men can deal with it
Princess Tofu: maybe if you put a sign on it ,"for sale $1" your neighbors will steal it.
Vladimir Yakamura: Hehe, probably. Dumbasses
Vladimir Yakamura: Ok, I have to pick something up. If you need help tonight, let me know
Princess Tofu: Okay. enjoy your day of slaving for a penny.
Vladimir Yakamura: how'd you know our stock prices?
Princess Tofu: It goes without saying. When are you getting your bailout?
Vladimir Yakamura: after I find my sugar daddy. I'll be on later. Or call me if you need help, otherwise call me and we can plan next Friday. Talk to you later, sugar buns
Princess Tofu: Bye sweetie!