Ilsa Fujimoto: and Hillary loses her mind
Vladimir Yakamura: Laura, I'd like to beep beep beep rolled up magazine beep beep beep canola oil beep beep beep beep Dinah Shore.
Ilsa Fujimoto: Your dad would be so proud
Vladimir Yakamura: Yes, he's a longshoreman with Tourette's as well.
Vladimir Yakamura: I think your web page should be www.hillaryloseshershit.com
Ilsa Fujimoto: I can't believe there isn't one already
Vladimir Yakamura: I'm tired. I'm bored. I'm hungry. I want chicken. I want cake. My hard drive won't work. I can't listen to music. I want to go home.
Ilsa Fujimoto: wow, that's a lot not going on
Ilsa Fujimoto: why don't you come down here & buy me lunch?
Vladimir Yakamura: Sure, I'll drive all the way down from the boonies just to buy your happy ass some lunch.
Vladimir Yakamura: Why don't I run home and make you something? We could have a picnic!
Ilsa Fujimoto: you're in the boonies?
Vladimir Yakamura: Yes, at our other location.
Ilsa Fujimoto: why?
Vladimir Yakamura: Don't get me started.
Ilsa Fujimoto: yikes! C'mon, you know you want to vent
Vladimir Yakamura: It's a stupid policy where everyone has to take turns sitting out here for a week. It sucks because the computers are very slow. The phone system is nice, though. I'll give them that.
Ilsa Fujimoto: you didn't even mention that you'd be out there this week
Vladimir Yakamura: I thought I did. I've been complaing to anyone who will sit still for five seconds.
Ilsa Fujimoto: no you must've forgot in all your excitement over the Bachelor
Vladimir Yakamura: excitement is a strong word, Hillary
Ilsa Fujimoto: I know that's why I #$% used it
Vladimir Yakamura: calm down there, crazy
Vladimir Yakamura: why don't you go out into the courtyard and hyperventilate?
Ilsa Fujimoto: you don't go $^&( yourself
Vladimir Yakamura: Maybe I will. And it will be the most dramatic one ever!
Vladimir Yakamura: I don't want to eat out, but I want to get out of here for a while, you know?
Ilsa Fujimoto: yeah, totally
Vladimir Yakamura: It looks so nice out
Ilsa Fujimoto: it is
Vladimir Yakamura: I should be walking in the woods and then come home to a roaring fire and a nice dinner
Ilsa Fujimoto: when did you become Ward Cleaver
Vladimir Yakamura: About the same time you forgot how to accessorize
Ilsa Fujimoto: that never happened, skank
Vladimir Yakamura: whatever you have to tell yourself
Vladimir Yakamura: what kind of Mexican vegetable/salad would be good for a Mexican dinner?
Ilsa Fujimoto: why you asking me beaner?
Vladimir Yakamura: Isn't there an old proverb about asking the slowest among us for ideas?
Ilsa Fujimoto: then you should ask yourself
Vladimir Yakamura: Ooh - good one. Except not.
Ilsa Fujimoto: you're the one being heinous'
Vladimir Yakamura: If heinous is the new word for awesome, then yes
Ilsa Fujimoto: oh lord, denial is never pretty
Vladimir Yakamura: Well, I do feel pretty. I'm singing the song
Ilsa Fujimoto: I'm surprised that people haven't run from you yet
Vladimir Yakamura: I'm singing Animal from Def Leppard. Everyone loves that song
Ilsa Fujimoto: especially when you sing it
Vladimir Yakamura: It's the interperative dance that reels them in
Vladimir Yakamura: but it's the sequined jumpsuit that makes them stay
Ilsa Fujimoto: yes, that would be the natural reaction
Vladimir Yakamura: I want to run away. To where all the linens smell of Febreeze
Vladimir Yakamura: I think I'm going to drive somewhere at lunch. I need to find a mailbox to send my Netflix movies back and to send out this year's Halloween cards
Ilsa Fujimoto: that sounds like a great idea
Vladimir Yakamura: I know
Ilsa Fujimoto: sometimes you have them
Vladimir Yakamura: and sometimes you don't
Ilsa Fujimoto: sometimes you feel like a nut
Vladimir Yakamura: Always with the potty mouth
Vladimir Yakamura: Ok, I'm running out for awhile. I, like herpes, shall return!
Ilsa Fujimoto: k
Vladimir Yakamura: How are there NO public mailboxes out here? Don't these morons ever need to send mail?
Ilsa Fujimoto: no, they can't write
Vladimir Yakamura: Idiots. I'll have to find a box on the way home
Vladimir Yakamura: gotta get my cards out!
Ilsa Fujimoto: I know!
Vladimir Yakamura: If you have a spare minute, go to www.santabot.com
Vladimir Yakamura: Try and have a real conversation with it. It's hysterical.
Vladimir Yakamura: I'm taking Friday off
Ilsa Fujimoto: cool, this site is funny
Vladimir Yakamura: I wish I could save the chat logs. I've had two great conversations with it.
Vladimir Yakamura: It just told me it's gestation period was almost complete
Ilsa Fujimoto: that's funny, gotta go
Vladimir Yakamura: bye