Vlad: Did you know that ANTM is the CW's highest rated program?
Ilsa: not surprising
Vlad: That's sad. The entire future of a network rests on the heads of those bitches
Ilsa: consider the target audience
Vlad: Well, Reba is back this weekend. I know you're all a-twitter
Ilsa: If I had Tivo........
Vlad: Whatever. You're totally going to tape it and have yourself a little Reba's Back party.
Vlad: Gonna make grits and collards and other down-home favorties
Ilsa: totally
Vlad: Yeee Hawww
Vlad: Let's bring back "kiss my grits"
Ilsa: or stow it
Vlad: Who said that?
Ilsa: Mel
Vlad: Ahh, I never watched the show
Ilsa: but you know kiss my grits, I thought you'd know the other line
Vlad: Well, Kiss My Grits was so famous
Ilsa: yes, I guess stow it was 2nd in line but far, far behind
Vlad: It's like Where's the Beef? You heard it all over the place even if you didn't watch the commercials
Ilsa: true that
Vlad: I'm going to bring back 'what you talkin' 'bout?"
Ilsa: don't lie, I know you watched it
Vlad: watched what?
Ilsa: and What's Happenin'
Vlad: We were not allowed to watch that kind of television. Only Happy Day, Laverne & Shirly and god help me, Little Fucking House on the Goddam Prairie
Ilsa: Weird, what were you parents racists???
Vlad: Probably. Bastards
Vlad: Actually, we couldn't watch most stuff. No Three's Company. so I guess they hated white morons, too
Ilsa: Not white morons that live in Milwaukee or on the prairie
Vlad: But those were morons from a simpler time and didn't wear low cut tops or short-shorts
Vlad: And no one on LHOTP had to pretend to be gay in order to share a house with two girls
Ilsa: ah, I see the distinction. Wasn't there a gay character near the end of Prairie?
Vlad: Yeah. Sure. I'm sure Mr. Landon would have allowed that.
Vlad: I was going to call you back the other night after we were talking about musicals.
Ilsa: really, did you think of another one?
Vlad: No, but I had "Three Little Maids" stuck in my head
Ilsa: hehe
Vlad: And it's back
Ilsa: damn it
Vlad: What are you working on?
Ilsa: shit load of diff stuff and almost done cleaning the oven, multi-tasking
Vlad: Hmm, clean my oven.
Ilsa: Mine's automatic
Vlad: "mine's automatic" whatever
Ilsa: yours isn't?
Vlad: Ha!
Ilsa: aren't you getting a new one?
Vlad: Is that a hint of what I'm getting for Xmas?
Ilsa: if you still believe in Santa Clause, I guess it could be
Vlad: Wow. Mean.
Vlad: I'm taking your present right back to the store.
Ilsa: to the .99 store?
Vlad: Goodwill
Ilsa: wow, I guess that is my loss
Ilsa: well, I'm hungry, I'm going to make lunch, you can call me on my home phone if you want, I'm signing off for now